Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
