I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
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