loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
