last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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