I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
Randomize
