it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
