Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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