You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
