You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Randomize
