Buhtt sex?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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