And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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