Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize
