you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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