I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
