I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
