Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
