love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Randomize
