She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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