come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize