beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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