Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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