and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize