but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
How many fucks given?
0.12846
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