I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Duck Duck Cougar?
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
