Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
