Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
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