I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
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