I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Randomize
