I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
