my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
