Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize