We're like a lot better than the average bears
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize