he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
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