I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
