so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
