Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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