At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
