well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
