But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
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