you guys were way drunker than both of me
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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