there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
