So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
so let's talk penis.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
He better not be in your backpack
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
