At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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