And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
We talked him into tasing himself.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
my liver is dry heaving
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
