They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
