Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
