plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
only you would photoshop your dick
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize
