That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
