hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
