I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
